Love.

2010-02-15T01:49:00.001+08:00

I fucking miss you.

2010-02-07T23:55:00.001+08:00

Everything is going down:(

I lost everything.

2010-02-07T12:41:00.001+08:00

2010-02-02T01:13:00.000+08:00

It's my birthday.
The day of the year you feel even more shittier.
All i wanted is to hear from you on this day.
Or even a birthday wish.
Wishes don't come true.

2010-01-31T05:15:00.002+08:00

Am i that much of a bad person.
I feel so unappreciated.
Nothing i did meant anything.
Worst part is that my birthday is here.
Never celebrated it before and once again don't think i will.
You really broke my heart.
I feel so numb to everyone else.

2010-01-29T02:33:00.002+08:00

He might be leaving soon.
Real soon.

2010-01-27T01:00:00.000+08:00

I was never special.
Never more than anything.
Just another person in the crowd.
My actions, my feelings, there's no need for it.
There's no need for me.

2010-01-22T05:12:00.001+08:00

I've never spent a valentines day before.
I've always been home.
She said she'll take me out, The first girl who ever said that to me.
Well now. I can just forget about it.
Nothing to look forward to. Not my birthday, Not valentines.

If angels existed. I'd ask them for just one wish.
All i want for my birthday is that one angel whom used to be my side.

I don't care what people say about me. But somehow i end up tearing each night.

2010-01-22T03:50:00.003+08:00

Today i met someone. A friend's friend. He told me a story about someone who used to be in my sec school. I never knew this but, he died. He committed suicide. He told me, no one knew. Not his gf not his family. That person just felt like things weren't working well and that his presence wasn't needed. So he left. Its vastly sad. But it seemed like everyone only missed him after he was gone.

2010-01-20T00:49:00.000+08:00

Your first love. You know who I'm talking about, because I bet you read the words, "first love," and that one girl just came to mind. There's nothing like that first girl you were afraid to love. That one girl you knew it was love, despite what others said. That one girl who changed your expectations and that one girl who you know all the others can't be replaced with. Because deep down inside, you know she was the one. The one who set the standards for love. You were the one for me. You didn't care how i was or what i was wearing. You held me tight. The first girl's hand i ever held. You touched my heart and made me realize how beautiful you were on the inside. Today in my friend's class i saw a girl, she ran and hugged her bf. She said "You make me feel complete" and they smiled. Every moment, it just strikes me back. Everything you did for me. No one has ever bought me anything. Only mom. You did. It was a mere jelly bean packet. But it meant the world to me. A kiss that would never be able to be described. The only one who can make me tear when i realize your not by my side. alone. The feeling of your hands holding tightly onto mine, faded away. I've lost myself. I miss you. You may hate me. But no matter what. I'll always remember what we had and what we were. I don't even think anyone checks this space no more.

She is the girl with the sweetest heart.
the girl with the smile which shines.
the one who never failed to make this ordinary boy smile.

2010-01-20T00:20:00.003+08:00

Millions and millions of years would still not give me half enough time to describe that tiny instant of all eternity when you put your arms around me and I put my arms around you.

2010-01-08T00:05:00.003+08:00

I wish you would just show up on my doorstep. Not with anything special, just you. And when I'd open the door, you'd smile. And while I'm trying to figure out what the hell you're doing here, you'd tell me how hard the past months have been, how much you've thought about me, how much you regretted everything. And then you'd take me into your arms and ask me to forgive you, and I would without hesitation. Then you'd grab my face and kiss me the way you used to, and everything would be perfect again.

The thing is. I dont think you'd like this anymore.

2010-01-07T01:52:00.003+08:00

I'm such a geek :/ .
I still cry over her every night.
Its like two strangers turning into dust.
I feel like i never did anything to make her happy or special.
Would you listen to me if i wrote a song to sing to you.
Then again. You said you don't want anything with me.
I can't pretend like i don't care. Cause i do.
No words can describe how much i care.

2010-01-06T01:23:00.002+08:00

I'd do anything to show you that you will be the only one in my heart.

2010-01-01T15:27:00.003+08:00

I am an idiot.

2009-12-19T05:20:00.006+08:00

I want to sing you a song telling you everything i miss,
Telling you how much you mean.

Sometimes i even missed the times i cried,
cause you were next to me,

I'm sorry i could never be the cute white guy with that smile,
I could never promise you the most expensive gift or date,
Only the small things,

The small things which i knew would make you happy.
Your the meaning of love to me.
The way you smiled,
The way you'd hold me,

You were the girl i'd tell anyone,
She's the one.

Your happiness was mine,

I'll always be that shy boy,
The one who cried,
The dark one with the curly hair
The one who'd ask dumb qns,

Will i ever again be that boy whom used to make you smile,
Whose hand you held, and felt complete.
If you ever see this,
I miss you.
This is the moment i feared.

2009-12-19T05:16:00.003+08:00

Would it mean something,
If i told you i still love you as much,
If we could put everything behind,
and just start anew.

No one ever liked me for who i am on my own..
but you did..
You were special for being you too.
Your the kind of girl people dream about.
The girl who likes you for who you are..

I lost her.

2009-12-19T05:13:00.002+08:00

I was just a nerd,
before you held my hand,
before you gave me a kiss,
the first ever kiss i got from someone who meant so much to me.

2009-12-18T14:27:00.000+08:00

Everything is going down in pieces.
I slept for around 18 hours after my final presentation.
i dreamt,
I dreamt we were still okay,
You were smiling with me,
Now your on your own,
I should just leave it as a dream i guess..

2009-12-18T14:12:00.002+08:00

I wonder if you ever miss me.

2009-12-12T03:11:00.003+08:00

The more people i meet, the more i realize no one would ever be as special as you.

No one would love as sincere as you. Your a beauty in your own way. Your so near yet so far :(

2009-12-10T12:24:00.003+08:00

Everything was perfect, Until you decided i wasn't.
i gave my heart &
that's all i can give you,
& if that's not enough,
then i'm not enough..

2009-12-06T23:33:00.000+08:00

Is it my fault that i can't leave you.
You mean too much.
I really mean it from the bottom of my heart :(

2009-12-04T02:01:00.006+08:00

Deep inside everyday and every night i knew in my heart, i might not have been the best guy or the best looking guy you know. But each day i tried my best in my own way to love you with everything i had. It didn't seem like it worked. At times like these.. I feel like i didn't make you happy enough. You stopped feeling how you did before. I'm scared of everyone and everything these days,

Everytime i go to town or bugis or where ever it may be. I just seem to think about the old times.

I'm sorry to be in this state, You once said you'd never do anything to hurt me. But seems like now..somehow i'm hurting myself. I've never cried like this ever before and i don't think anyone ever comes here so it's ok. a few weeks back, i was near bugis. Walked by the place where i asked you the question. There were another 2 people..I over heard the guy..only thing i heard "Will you be mine? " I hope he's all happy now. You were the only one who'd ever say those things and make me feel that way.

You know..The saddest part is i never had a picture with you..To even look at. You'll always remain the most beautiful and special girl in my life.No one can ever take that place. I'll never forget anything, From the first time you smiled at me to the time you called me nerd. I never felt alone when i'm surrounded by people and all the people i was close too. I feel scared.

2009-12-04T01:39:00.000+08:00

Can we have start afresh someday?

I want to wait for the very first girl who made me realize the meaning of happiness.

I miss you, I'd always be there for you even if You'd never want me there.

2009-11-28T02:13:00.006+08:00

I made it hard for you i'm sorry.
It seems like your life is better off without me.
I'll stop the nonsense today. Will never bother you again.
I hope you'll get happier. With me, I'll just see what happens.
For the better or worse, Who knows? but you need not worry cause i'm just a past memory.
I'm stuck in this negative spiral and making it hard for you unknowingly. I can't just be happy and all normal. It's harder than anything else. Maybe cause i loved you with everything. Don't think will ever do that to anyone else or anything like that anymore to anyone. Well its over now and hey, hope things work well for you.
Goodbye is the hardest thing to say. because you walk away with only memories & and well memories..they fade away.
You don't need to worry about this boy or what's happening to him. As long as your happy. It's good enough for him to know.
You once told me you still cared. One day i'll see that and one day we might just talk. Till then it'll remain a voice in y head.

2009-11-28T01:07:00.003+08:00

Last night in the hospital bed.
What was i thinking.
I could have died.
That was too much.
What if i didn't get there in time..

2009-11-27T14:42:00.001+08:00

The nearer you get to death.
The more it hurts.
I realized it.

2009-11-27T03:16:00.000+08:00

Over. It was hard.
I thought it ought to workout somehow.
But i was just making things worse. She seems better off without me.
Well doesn't matter if it affects me. As long as she's happy.
Time for me to stop.

2009-11-24T02:21:00.004+08:00

Kicked out with no place to go.

How much i need you now.

2009-11-23T02:24:00.004+08:00

Feels like you just threw me away and never gave a second thought.

You said you cared. you loved. you'd never hurt.

Now on this end of the boat there's someone hurt and hoping why cant things be normal.

Seems like its easy for you to get along with anybody else but me..

I’ll admit it, I’m an addict, but not in the usual sense of the word.
You see, I’m addicted to you.
When I’m around you I’m on an incredible high, and when I’m not with you,
the withdrawl is unbearable.

2009-11-22T06:47:00.002+08:00

Nice to seeing you all well.

But will we ever talk again..

It feels weird without you.

2009-11-21T05:00:00.001+08:00

i miss the surprises you give me.

2009-11-20T01:45:00.002+08:00

No matter how bad the break up was.

I still love you, nothing can change that.

Nothing and never.

How can we throw things like that away.

Even if its just me. I'll love you without you being here.

I care. More than how much i care for myself.

2009-11-16T03:01:00.001+08:00

Isn't it ironic that you love the ones who hurt you and hurt the ones who loves you.

rien ne va changer si je mourais

2009-11-16T00:30:00.004+08:00

Drugs and death.

2009-11-15T21:19:00.002+08:00

Will people miss me if i'm gone.

I miss you everyday

But Seems like it was so damn easy to throw me out of your life.

You gave up on me, you gave up on us.

will us ever be again?

Or was it just another fictional story.

Where in the end you leave.

2009-11-13T17:38:00.001+08:00

Is there someone else in your life.

Still in love with you

2009-11-12T01:04:00.008+08:00

You know that feeling?
That feeling when you just want the right thing to fall into the right place,
not only because it's right, but because it will mean that such a thing is still possible?

I want to believe that.

I'd go to the highest point in the world and sing you a song,

if you'd listen to it.

Just the first verse.

Will i ever have her back,

2 months

2009-11-12T00:41:00.005+08:00

Her name and voice is a song to my heart,

It has always been that way too.

2 months ago..I held her hands and asked her if she'd be mine.

If only you could still be next to me,

If only i could turn back time,

I'd never have gone overseas,

2009-11-11T10:49:00.001+08:00

Its so hard when your family seems to be away from you,

All thats in my mind is how to get my school work better.

and also looking forward each day to see if you'd be back into my life.

I hope someday that would happen.

Till then,

Take your time.

2009-11-11T02:37:00.004+08:00

A tear each night.

2009-11-11T02:04:00.002+08:00

"You know, your the first girl i ever held hands with"

"Really?"

"Yeah"

2009-11-11T01:32:00.001+08:00

But love wasn't about sacrifice, and it wasn't abut falling short of someone's expectations.
By definition, love made you better than good enough; it redefined perfection to
include your traits, instead of excluding them.

2009-11-10T11:13:00.000+08:00

Fear of replacement.

2009-11-10T02:07:00.004+08:00

Well things seemed real bad, and just felt like talking to you.

Even if what i texted was something random.

I should have my limits at a time like this.

Not be doing the same thing over.

I'll refrain from doing this again.

Promise cross my heart,

2009-11-09T10:34:00.007+08:00

Things are all still the same, quite screwed..

I feel so alone when i'm surrounded by people..

Parents still being the same..Not talking.

I miss that voice which accompanies me where ever i go..

I did a lot of mistakes when i was with her..asked her stupid stuff..i realize them now..

She's a gem. and i miss her. alot.

2009-11-08T02:39:00.001+08:00

I miss her.

2009-11-08T02:04:00.003+08:00

Everything was amazing to me,

Felt like heaven on earth,

Until it all crashed on me,

Family dissolved,

Love disappeared,

Everything faded,

and there i was,

alone.

Wishing if only i could live that happiness for another minute.

With no problems,

Just being happy.

The smallest thing you did,

it helped.

Thanks.

2009-11-08T01:06:00.002+08:00

Things are getting worse,

Family isn't talking to me no more,

I'm hoping she talks to me like how she does soon,

School is dreading me.

Why can't there be any good happening,

2009-11-07T09:31:00.003+08:00

I need to give her space and not make things hard for her, thats the only way she'll ever talk to me like usual. I hope she feels better in time, i made things hard for her. But it is for me too.

Hope things get better.

2009-11-06T14:47:00.004+08:00

You used to say you were scared i'd leave you.

I know how it feels now.

Well, all i can do now, is just wait.. Hoping you'd just talk to me,

And maybe just one smile.

2009-11-06T00:21:00.003+08:00

Well maybe it's just me.

Its amazing how your heart can change just like that.

So we aren't meant to be..

You'll find your other half, but love seems to be just a fictional thing to me now.

You cant feel anything your heart doesn't feel, but how do i throw away what i feel.

So does that mean what you felt before, wasn't fully true..

People who are meant to be will find their way, but i didn't get a single chance after i returned.

I did my best, and it still failed.

Well, the truth does hurt, and i just want to talk to you as per normal..

But i'm sure i'll feel worse when your with another,

I'm broken now..

Have your space and please talk :(

2009-11-06T00:12:00.002+08:00

it seem liked it was so easy for you to just leave me out of your life.

Emotional dilemma and lost.

If only you'd say hi like you used to.

2009-11-05T03:08:00.001+08:00

If we were meant to be, we'll find a way in the end.

i still believe in that.

You just have to realise it too.

Not just believe what you think.

2009-11-05T03:00:00.000+08:00

I wish you'd just talk to me.

Its like you just left.

As though everything meant nothing.

2009-11-04T01:51:00.000+08:00

Honestly, i'm scared.

I'm scared i'd do something.

2009-11-04T01:23:00.002+08:00

Today is the night i cry alone,

With no one to comfort me,

no one to wipe my tears,

i lost the love of my life,

Her voice, her smiles,

I'm better off dead.

2009-10-27T03:45:00.002+08:00

I'm still in love with you.

2009-10-27T03:29:00.000+08:00

Your worth waiting for.

2009-10-27T01:47:00.001+08:00

I always hear stories of girls having crushes on some guys,
Funny thing is i never knew how it felt like,
I'm used to losing people around me.

2009-10-24T14:04:00.002+08:00

I'll leave you alone,
I'll leave everyone alone,
I was meant to be alone,
Not loved.Not cared for.

2009-10-23T13:37:00.002+08:00

It hurts inside,
I just want to be friends now,
and still spend time with you,
guess there're more important people in you life now,
Have fun with your friends,
I'm glad your happy with your surroundings and classmates,and friends,
I'll move away from your life from now.
I see the smiles you have when your without me,
I'll leave you like that..
All i did was cause disruptions.
You'll find someone who treats you better, someone who's not as sensitive,
someone who's better than this little boy,
Goodbye.

2009-10-23T00:35:00.001+08:00

I pray something bad happens to me.

2009-10-20T23:27:00.000+08:00

You want space, i'll give it.

I just want the old us back.

2009-10-20T06:31:00.004+08:00

We should never assume how we're going to feel now or in the future,

cause the heart changes, i can't seem to let go.

I mean why can't we wait and see if something happens,

We weren't meant to just say goodbye, There's always cure for every flaw.

I don't know if your alright, but i still love you.

Are you really going to leave me?

Is there no more trying?

How can i just move on, when i all ever wanted was you.

Maybe deep inside, i wasn't a perfect lover.

I just wanted to see you smile.

You didn't hurt me by making me cry, You made me realize how much i need you.

I'll pray for one more chance, one more shot at things,

I can't picture leaving you.

I cant picture us with someone else..

You love me enough to let me go?

I feel like, You have lost hope..

I tried my best, and if i can't even have you..

Which other girl would..

Afterall, the boy who loved you..was just a simple one..

he fell in love with you by accident, he fell in love truly.

He won't lose hope.

2009-10-20T00:11:00.006+08:00

The day your ready, I'll be waiting.

After everything, how could be lose it just like that.

I'll stay true to my heart.

I won't lose my love.

we once said, we will work things out,

No matter what it is,

I won't lose hope,

At least not till i'm down,

and without a last breath.

This too is a promise.

To myself.

It hurts so much,

But thats the more i want to give it time and try.

Its just another obstacle.

"Follow what your heart says"

2009-10-19T11:16:00.006+08:00

If only i had a chance to change everything.

maybe i'm not a good boyfriend,

I made you lose feelings,

I wish i'm still the lucky one for you.

How can i love another girl the same?

I still love you.

We can just believe, and try.

2009-10-18T23:23:00.016+08:00

Hopes die last.

Hopes die when the person dies.

I still feel the same way.

Hope things change.

Even if it takes time.

It was genuine.

It was true.

so why not wait.

And see if i'm lucky enough to have you.

Hope your feelings clear up, and you feel the same.

I believe it will, someday.

Its hard that it'll be the same with anyone else.

Who else can i expect to call me a nerd.

who else would else would be this sweet.

There are other people.

Other different people.

Their not the same.

Your one in a million.

You're once in a lifetime,
You made me discover one of the stars above us,

And when I thought that all the hope was gone,
You smile, there you were,

I always knew there was an answer for my prayer,
And you, you're the one, the one for me,

I don't know if anyone else can treat you and love you like i did.

It felt like it was just us.

I miss the times you told me i love you..even on fb msgs.

You said once, you wanted to try, cause you wanted us. you loved us.

I hope and pray that one day you will feel this way again, just a hope.

That would save my heart someday.If we both decide to try again.

I don't want to just lose you and let go..i want you, someday things will get better.

My heart tells me this

I still love you, and one day i hope i'd get another shot at us.

I do love us.

I care about you more than anyone.

2009-10-18T14:38:00.002+08:00

I got nothing to look forward to,

One fine day, we might prevail.

Our love is true. I still love us and you.

Broken.

2009-10-18T14:15:00.004+08:00

Will we ever be okay,

Be like what we were,

All i did was love you right? :(

Sometimes in life, i feel really lucky and happy.

But i guess thats when it strikes me, My feeling is wrong.

I'm not the lucky one, I'm not the one who makes people happy.

I'm just another guy.

One day, we might get back the spark..but who knows.

I hope one day, it happens..I know i did my best and i know i will be the best for you.

Its funny how everything which made me happy, everything and place which reminds me of you.

The exact same thing makes me miss you.

Its just empty.

I loved you more sincerely than anyone ever could.

Is that not what you want.

I believe one day, Things might change...

and you know, we never took a picture of us in the end..

Just a nerd, in the crowd.Nothing more.

I'll treasure what you gave me,the wrapper and stuff. for those were the times, i felt genuinely happy.

2009-10-15T15:30:00.003+08:00

Our Love is true.

2009-10-15T14:51:00.014+08:00

I really don't want to lose you.

I'm hoping & we're trying.

I want us.

In every person's life they will meet this certain someone, and I met...

2009-10-14T02:48:00.004+08:00

When i wake up each day, i feel you inside my heart.

It pumps with love, passion, and concern.

You have become a part of me.

A part of me inside,

Just like my lungs and bones and nerves which will always be there.

Your someone who's always going to stay in my heart.

The only girl who will ever be there.

I believe in love, Afterall, it is cause of you i know this feeling.

I will be there for you through the ups and downs.

Even if the skies start falling, you can count on me that i won't let my grip go with my arms around you.

Your my angel, Your my Sweetheart, Your my love,

Your my Gwen ♥

I love you.

2009-10-14T00:19:00.001+08:00

She once told me,

"For once in my life, i don't have to try and be happy. When i'm with you it just happens"

She's all i could ever ask for(:

Love

2009-10-13T14:11:00.003+08:00

I'm sorry about yesterday,

i never want you to feel that way again.

I got so scared i'll lose you cause of what i did.

I would never be that way again my dear.

Lets always stay this way.

Don't doubt if you can do this cause i know you can.

Your the only one who matters to me and i will never lose you,

I promise to keep you.

Just us,

2009-10-05T03:49:00.009+08:00

A list of movies i think would be great to watch with you.

Youth in Revolt (jan 2010)

Dare(november)

Peter and Vandy(some say as good as 500 days of summer) (nov/dec)

Youth in revolt

Dare

Peter and Vandy( It reminds me of us when she says "you apologize alot") (:

We like each other just the way we are. We'll tell one another our mistakes and learn from them whenever needed, thats how we'll make it amazing. Its just you and me. Always.

Love ♥

2009-09-29T21:42:00.001+08:00

2009-09-29T21:03:00.003+08:00

And i know every atom of me wants to be with you and perfect for you.

2009-09-25T08:29:00.004+08:00

Its just you and me, and it will always be you and me.

Don't worry ♥

2009-09-23T06:17:00.015+08:00

I know that only with you i am complete.

Every moment we have together would be a memory worth more than anything.

Do remember that my heart beats only for you, Your the only one that will ever be in it.

You changed my life the day we met.

Sweetheart this is our very own story in which its going to be only me and you.

I'm away at the moment but our affection intensifies and blooms more and more as the days pass.

I'll be back soon, cause without you i am incomplete. we're meant for each other my dear.

I love you Gwen.

2009-09-22T01:57:00.003+08:00

I'm stupid to ask so much, just for a small issue.

I deserve to cry more than just tonight.

Mathan is an idiot.

2009-09-21T04:48:00.004+08:00

You changed everything for me.

Now you are everything to me.

Gwen.

2009-09-20T18:53:00.000+08:00

I miss you Sweetheart. ♥

2009-09-13T02:08:00.009+08:00

A day i would never forget.

Sweetheart i cant wait to see you when i get back.

I'll miss you.

Your all i ever need. No one will take your place.

2009-09-11T03:34:00.005+08:00

A feeling i felt, only after meeting you.

2009-09-11T02:16:00.015+08:00

Everyday should be spent to the fullest.

Thanks for the sweet cupcakes my dear. (:

If I was to ever know what love is, it would be because of you.

2009-09-09T14:45:00.004+08:00

This is how i feel my dear.

2009-09-08T03:54:00.003+08:00

Indeed your special.
To everyone? i don't know. But to me, Always.
I'm afraid i made you moody earlier tonight.
I'm sorry.

2009-09-08T03:33:00.027+08:00

You make me see everything in a different way.
Things just keeep getting better.
You matter alot to me and took an irreplaceable place in my heart.
The only thing i have to endure for now is going away for 3 weeks.
I'll be back soon my dear and it will be back to normal.

Can't wait to see you later.

2009-09-01T04:10:00.020+08:00

It seems like every moment i spend with you becomes a precious memory.

Laughters and smiles exchanged,

Deep inside i tell myself, I never want to lose you.

Cause right now i know, no one could ever take your place.

The world is just another puzzle and we're two pieces who seem to fit perfectly.

I dropped a tear in the ocean,

when they find it, i'll stop caring about you.

2009-08-30T17:16:00.016+08:00

Special beyond words,

Your the only one for me.

It will just get better as time goes by.

2009-08-28T02:00:00.004+08:00

Cinderella on ice.

On that day, You'll know why i meant, its a special day for us.

I'll make you happy. I promise.

2009-08-27T14:42:00.005+08:00

I like the song.

2009-08-27T09:43:00.001+08:00

Your all i ever wanted. Nothing else.

2009-08-25T15:15:00.003+08:00

We all see the same sky.

It’s what we see in the sky that makes us different.

sometimes i see you.

2009-08-24T05:31:00.015+08:00

The conversation between your fingers and mine.

The first and only one i have.

I want it to stay that way.

Just you, the one who melts my insides,

With a subtle sweet grin.

I want to show you how much you mean to me,

Very soon.

2009-08-20T02:59:00.009+08:00

The past few days have been amazing for me,

If i was to ever have a favorite picture..

It would be because your in it with me..

2009-08-17T03:16:00.003+08:00

I want my wayfarer.

My dear, I've fallen for you.

2009-08-16T03:55:00.011+08:00

Today you made me realize how happy i can get because of someone.

I can sit with you for hours and it'll just go by like secs.

Its a feeling i want to have day after day.

I don't care how many fish there are in the sea. I don't want a fish. I want you.

I spend most of my nights just thinking, thinking for ways to make you smile.